Dear Mom,

Today is your birthday, and I love you dearly. You are managing to walk through what life has given us and I need you to know that we are all so proud of you. Nothing about this year has been simple or easy. But it has been filled with love and gratitude, and I promise more of that from all of us in this next year of your life. And every year to come.

I looked back to see what I had written about in past years on your birthday, and I was struck by how much this message describes our journey right now. It's all about taking courageous steps when we have no idea what we are getting ourselves into. We'll keep taking them together. You and me.

Now picture me behind you.

Meow.

[Only you'll get that, but I hope it made you smile.]

See that cute little girl?

It's her birthday today.

My mom is a woman who has taken so many courageous steps in her life. When she was in high school my Grandma Flo had gone to confession as she did every week, and the priest one afternoon refused to give her absolution for her sins unless she started sending her children to the Catholic school. My mom had good friends at her old school, played on a basketball team that won the state championship and had no desire to transfer anywhere... but her junior year she took the plunge and enrolled in the new school so Grandma could get absolution and save her soul.

Thank God.

Because that's where she met my dad. The cool guy who had a van and a boat and loved to dance... he fell in love with my mom and that's where the story gets started. I can't even imagine, with the pace my life exists, the pace my mom was living at my age. She married my dad in 1964 and had her first baby 9 months later... and had her sixth baby 8 years later at the age of 29.

She learned how to help out on a hog farm (clipping pigs' tails and teeth... a job I could never bring myself to do) not to mention taking care of six little kids, doing laundry, making meals and everything else that a household entails. And often, in the middle of it, a couple of dad's younger brothers would be living with them while they worked on the farm.

Does your head hurt yet?

And when I say something like "making meals" I mean full-out meals with meat, potatoes, side salads and dessert... and in the summer time that was how we had lunch and supper. The table was always set properly and while we had fun, we learned manners and how to be respectful.

When we were little and would come in off the bus, mom would sometimes have snacks ready for us... doing the little things that make a difference like putting our pudding in separate little fancy dishes so we would feel special... because sometimes love is in the smallest of details.

Now, truth be told, as we got older and my siblings started leaving the house, mealtime changed and the snacks became different, but that's because mom was taking courageous new steps in her life. She had gone to work for the first time in her married life and she eventually found herself employed at Merle Norman Cosmetics (where her favorite phrase was that natural beauty takes time). :) She started working there, eventually bought the business, and through trial and error made it a success.

I definitely get my creative side from mom and loved going to her store during my junior high and high school years... helping out, doing makeovers, even piercing ears. She taught me about not being afraid to try, assuming you can do anything with enough effort and believing that new challenges are a good thing. She eventually sold that business, but couldn't stay idle for long.

She has had a recurring dream for years about being in an old house and redecorating it, and she woke up one night and told dad she wanted to start an interior design business. Courageous steps. So they took our attached garage and converted it into a show room... and she was in business! At a time when most people would be slowing down my mom was just getting started. Her business eventually moved to a space in town where she got to be creative every day, helping people make their houses into the homes they want for their families.

There are a million things I could tell you about my mom... about how I was attached to her hip through most of my childhood, how she would show off being able to turn a cartwheel with the best of them, or how she would take the Izod lizard off an old shirt and sew it onto a new one so we felt a little cooler at school...

But today, on her birthday, I want to say that most importantly she helped teach me by her example to not be afraid to try when you have no idea what you're getting yourself into. Because that's the kind of lesson that brought me here to all of you.

Happy Birthday, Mom... I'm very proud of you, and love you oodles and caboodles all around the world and back.

YOU:create ... week 19

When I was in high school, Dad would drive us home from church and I would sit in the back seat singing the songs we had just heard, while Mom sat in the front seat singing the harmony. Dad was convinced [seriously] that Mom and I could be Naomi and Wynonna. He thought if the Judd's could make it big there was no reason we couldn't do it, too.

Bless his heart.

I loved those moments because Dad really enjoyed listening to us. I didn't grow up in a family that just couldn't wait to hear me sing. It was probably more that most of them couldn't wait for me to stop singing :), which is why it was always so shocking to me once I got to college that people would ask me to sing at the most random of times.

Freshman year I had friends on my dorm floor who would call down to my room after they had gotten all ready for bed so I could come sing them to sleep. Later, when I was off campus, I would have friends over and make them big dinners... and it became habit that after they were all full and dishes were sitting empty on the table, they would lay on the floor and have me sing to them while they relaxed and digested.

I thought they were crazy. But I also loved being able to do something so simple that made someone so happy.

So that one year, when I had the opportunity to record a few songs, I jumped at the chance knowing there were some friends who would enjoy it. My nieces and nephews were little, and I loved being able to give them a cassette tape of Aunt Sara so they could hear me sing to them whenever they wanted. My niece Anna used to sit in their basement with her little plastic tape player and sing along with me. I loved it.

But the one who clearly loved it most was Dad. How do I know this? Because every single time the family was home and one of the grandkids rode with him in his truck, they came back in the house saying, "Hey Aunt Sara, we just listened to you sing." I'd hop in the truck to ride with Dad to get a movie, he'd turn the key in the ignition and there I would be... singing from the cd player... and he'd start humming along.

He listened to me all the time.

I'm not sure I've ever been more proud than to see that he was proud of me.

All those years ago, I never imagined that creating a quick cd of music would have such a lasting impact for me. I never imagined that Breath of Heaven would play at my Aunt Judy's funeral when I couldn't travel home. I never dreamed the only presence I would have at Dad's funeral would be my voice that I recorded so many years prior. I had no idea how much it would mean to me to have something to offer when it was no longer physically possible to give.

Some of you guys have asked over the past few years if you could order a cd, but rather than go through the bother of all of that, I thought I'd offer it up as a YOU:create. Admittedly, I feel as silly about offering it now as I did singing to my friends after a good meal, but if it's a small way I can make you happy then I am all for it. I created it years ago... I sang one song after another without the opportunity to fix bad notes or lost breath, so there are many flaws and many mistakes... but I put my heart in it and I hope it blesses yours.

To download the songs, all you have to do is click on that download button and it will take you to the download page.

Hope you enjoy... Merry Christmas!

I can’t wait to see what you guys came up with this week! Just click below and follow the instructions to link to your project. When it asks you to choose the web or a file for your thumbnail, choose web. Then it will take you to a list of the images on the page you are linking to and you’ll be able to choose a photo to represent your project.

I'm Talking to YOU.

It was last year at this time that I clicked on a video link in an email, only to see a black screen and hear the Alias theme song begin to play.

It was a tease to let me know I had a mission.

My mission was simple: wait for a follow-up video that would explain my Christmas gift from the Shan Clan.

A few days later another video arrived, and there in front of me were my friends who I knew – but with whom I had never spoken. Who I had written with back and forth, sharing our hearts and our lives and our never ending sarcasm, but had never seen in person.

My gift was that I was going to be seeing them all the time. They were going to be sending me videos of their every day lives, talking to me and performing for me, going on drives and hanging out while watching movies. Things normal friends do together that we knew we couldn't.

Except through the magic of a Flip camera.

It was the most amazing Christmas present. It has been the most amazing year of being a full-on member of their family. And in a million years, I would never have dreamed that I would go from seeing them on video for the first time last Christmas, to having them here in the condo with me for this Christmas.

My heart can barely take it. I am the most blessed human on the planet.

But it got me thinking...

Wouldn't it be fitting if this Christmas, when the Flip camera is here at my house, with my people I love so dearly, that I did the same for you? How about, while they are here, we take a minute to do a video for YOU. You who I know but have never talked to. You who I have written back and forth with, sharing our hearts and our lives and our never ending sarcasm, but have never seen in person. :)

You all know I'm not the most comfortable on the other side of the camera, but I'm thinking if I have my family hanging out with me – my sweet Nie Nie and Yodi and their parents – I might not feel so ridiculous chatting with people while being filmed.

I mean, after a whole year of doing that for me, they're old hats at it, right? So if I can get a couple of them to do a video blog with me, what do you all want to hear about?

Let's make this comment section for any questions you might have for me, for them, for us. What do you want to know about? What can we share with you while their Flip is here and I can show you around?

I'll bring you along for a bit this Christmas... it'll be lovely to have the chance to talk to YOU.

Gitz Bits 2010: Week 49

Monday, December 6, 2010

I have "met" a sweet little 8 year old from Singapore named Sara. I can tell we have a lot more in common than just our name, because that child is one heck of a crafty little girl. She made me this amazing Funky Fairy to keep me company here in the condo, so I hung her in a special spot by my wall of doodles.

I was going to use Funky Fairy as an ornament, but decided she needed to be a year round addition. So sweet.

Tuesday, December 7, 2010

Susie read my Gitz Bits last week and then called to see how bad I was feeling. I may have offered her a million dollars for this slush. I feel no shame in that extravagant offer since she totally knows I'm not good for it. :)

I hadn't kept any food or liquids down since the previous Friday, and my miracle slush hit the spot. I seriously spent over a week getting sick, having headaches and watching the room spin all because a storm was approaching.

So I'm buckling in, because this may be one looooong Iowa winter.

Wednesday, December 8, 2010

On the plus side, I got to cuddle with him all week.

Riley usually burrows under the covers by my legs, but lately has taken to getting under the covers and then peeking his head out on a pillow next to me. It might be the cutest thing I've ever seen in my life.

Thursday, December 9, 2010

This is what I usually refer to as the picture door, since I leave the Christmas card photos up year round. But it's that weird time between taking last year's photos down and waiting anxiously for this year's crop to land in my mailbox.

So for the next week or so we're just going to call the picture door "sad lonely door" instead. I can't get over how bare it looks... there is no way I could leave it undecorated again now that I'm used to it being so colorful and happy.

Friday, December 10, 2010

I swear to God Riley wasn't in the frame when I first aimed the camera in this direction. I just wanted to take a random shot to see how the bokeh from the Christmas tree looked. Before I could get a shot off I had to refocus for the attention grabbing pup. :)

We don't call him the Blog Dog for nothing.

Saturday, December 11, 2010

And so it begins...

Sunday, December 12, 2010

I have to admit, despite the fact that there is ice under that snow and the wind chill hovered around –28*, our little amount of snow felt incredibly anticlimactic for me.

Other parts of the state got a good 10 inches – it was a good old fashioned Iowa blizzard – but we were just on the cusp of really getting dumped on.

Here's the thing... I lost an entire week of my life adjusting to the weather change this storm brought with it. And to justify that kind of all-around illness, I expected it to look like the frozen tundra around here!

But I have no doubt that is yet to come...

Thanks for once again sharing my week with me! Click on the button below if you want to go to Jessica’s site and check out the other participants showing off their weekly photos as well:

(in)courage: Everything You Can

"You gotta just try to do every thing you can, when it's your time to do it."

I was watching Staff Sgt. Salvatore Giunta, who is from a small Iowa town not far from me, receive the esteemed Medal of Honor for bravery shown in active duty. Sal had told President Obama that he was just doing his job, and following advice he had gotten when he first became a soldier.

During his first tour of duty in Afghanistan, his Team Leader said to him: "You gotta just try to do everything you can, when it's your time to do it."

It struck me as the most profoundly simple statement. And while I'm sure it is essential advice for a battlefield, it also occurred to me it's advice that works in every circumstance for every person trying to follow in Jesus' footsteps.

And those of his parents.

::

To read the rest of the post, click over to the (in)courage site: Everything You Can

:: EDITED to add full post ::

“You gotta just try to do every thing you can, when it’s your time to do it.”

I was watching Staff Sgt. Salvatore Giunta, who is from a small Iowa town not far from me, receive the esteemed Medal of Honor for bravery shown in active duty. Sal had told President Obama that he was just doing his job, and following advice he had gotten when he first became a soldier.

During his first tour of duty in Afghanistan, his Team Leader said to him: “You gotta just try to do everything you can, when it’s your time to do it.”

It struck me as the most profoundly simple statement. And while I’m sure it is essential advice for a battlefield, it also occurred to me it’s advice that works in every circumstance for every person trying to follow in Jesus’ footsteps.

And those of his parents.

I am thinking of Mary, frightened and scared, not knowing what to make of this angel standing before her. But she said yes. She did what she could when it was her time to be asked.

And Joseph. Being asked to marry a woman who was pregnant – and not with his child. He was being asked to sacrifice his life and all he had been taught… and he said yes. He did everything he could when it was his time to be asked.

They did their duty. They traveled for the census to be counted. They continually did the next right thing – not because they were promised riches or status or rewards. They traveled, they suffered in a stable to bring a baby into the world without any idea of how they were going to manage next. But they did everything they could, because it was their time to do it.

I hear the story so many times that I begin to assume they knew what the end result of their sacrifices would be. Sometimes I lull myself into thinking I would have made those sacrifices if it meant the Savior of the world could come to do His work.

But then I remember that Mary and Joseph knew no such thing. They knew no more of their future than we do. They didn’t know Jesus would get lost in a temple. They didn’t know he would turn water into wine and heal the sick and bring sight to the blind. They didn’t know their precious baby boy would be beaten and ridiculed and hung on a cross.

They were simply doing everything they could, when it was their time to do it.

It pierces me. It pierces me to know they simply said yes because it was the right thing to do. It pierces me that I, in this life, have so many chances to say yes. It pierces me that every moment of my life could be my time to do everything I can. I may not change the world, but I might change a life. I might be called with an urging in my spirit, and if I choose not to pay attention and act on it, I might miss my moment.

My time to do what I can.

That’s what I am thinking about this Christmas. I’m always overwhelmed and grateful that Jesus came to this world as a baby to save me – thousands of years later – a simple soul not unlike any other.

But this year, I’m wondering how I can be more like Mary and Joseph. How I can do everything I can… now… when it’s my time to do it.

Will you take that challenge with me? Will you look beyond the celebrations and the wrappings and the carols we hum as we busy about our lives – and pay close attention to the little details in the lives of those around you?

Because you never know when it may be your time to do everything you can.

Flashback Friday: A Song for You

Hello, my sweet blog people. After a very un-fun week I'm here to tell you I'm still alive and kicking. :) Ok, I'm not doing the Rockette kind of kicks, but I'm working on the the much shorter, joint restricted, spondylitis version.

I thought this week would be a good time for our annual Flashback Friday to the days of Advent when I used to sing this song at St. Stephen's. There are a great many things in this life I miss doing, but looking into people's eyes when I sing this song is way up there on the list. I'm awfully grateful I can at least do it for you in this small, imperfect, but heartfelt form...

Breath of Heaven
[originally posted 12.8.08]

Since my first day at college, I was involved at St. Stephen the Witness Catholic Student Center. I loved that place and the ever-evolving community. As a freshman I had upperclassmen who took me under their wing. I had friends my age who were going through the same ups and downs of college life. And as I made my way through the years, I eventually mentored others and took them under my wing. While the community changed, the environment didn't. It was a place of love and support and acceptance and learning.

All of those things are still in that building for me. I haven't been able to be there to celebrate Mass or join in activities for a long time, but I can close my eyes and see the details, smell the essence, hear the trickle of the baptismal font and feel the closeness of the air that hugs you into a sense of serenity. I loved worshipping there.

Mostly, I loved singing there.

I'm not the best singer in the world, but it is, hands down, the thing I loved to do the most. I don't read music so I would meet the pianist for our practice session carrying a mini-recorder to tape the songs. Then I would take it home and play it over and over to have the music ingrained in me until I could sing without thinking.

I would stand up to the microphone on Sunday morning and see a sea of faces who were there for something so much bigger than us. And I would do the same thing each time... silently pray the Memorare and ask for Mary to send one of the angels in the choir to sing for me that day. I would ask that whatever message was supposed to be given would be heard, and then I would concentrate on the words and the meaning and trust that the notes would come out right. Sometimes they did and sometimes they didn't, but regardless I always felt a connection with the community.

One year around Christmas time I had recorded a radio jingle for our local airport... it was the corniest jingle ever, but the studio I was at gave me a deal on some recording time. I had enough money from the jingle to be in the studio for one hour, and I recorded eight songs back-to-back. Each song had one take... no going back to fix it if I hit a wrong note or ran out of breath. I took the opportunity to record the songs I had done most often at St. Stephen's to share with the people it meant something to.

The song I still have people tell me they miss at this time of year was a song I would have sang today on the Feast of the Immaculate Conception... Breath of Heaven. So, for all of you from St. Stephen's that read the blog, and for all of you new friends of mine, I'm going to share my recording of it today. I know others have sang it better, but I hope you get as much out of hearing it as I got out of singing it for so many years. Just click the play button on the player below and wait a second for it to start. And remember I'm not a professional... just a person who loved the experience of sharing the moment.

07 Breath of Heaven by gitzengirl

Gitz Bits 2010: Week 48

*** Quick Posting Note ***

Hey, peeps... I haven't exactly been feeling stellar these past few days, so I'm going to take a couple off and see if my body can't bounce back a little. You all know how much I hate doing that, so you also know I won't be gone long. ;)

If I'm not back posting by the end of the week, be sure to come back on Monday as I'll have my Christmas (in)courage post up, and am sure I'll be back posting after that.

This disease just kicks my butt sometimes.

Rest assured, I'll keep kicking it back.

Monday, November 29, 2010

Welcome to Christmas at the Condo. :)

I had to take the ornaments off of one of my little trees this year [yes, I put my trees away decorated with a bag over them] because it needed a new strand of lights, and I ended up liking the simple look of just lights and berries. So I made a little ornament centerpiece instead of putting them back on.

It's kind of a fun little change.

Tuesday, November 30, 2010

I showed you my red room tree in last week's post since it was the only one with working lights, but it turned out my little tree for my nativity set just had a loose bulb. So I was able to get it lit and my Willow Tree nativity up and in place.

This is one of my favorite decorations – there's something so simple about the Willow Tree look that I think suits a nativity scene perfectly.

Wednesday, December 1, 2010

"Deer's Lookin' at You, Kid" was definitely yesterday's favorite caption, but I loved Candy's comment when she came with this light extravaganza.

I [as always] immediately said we needed to name the deer, and she said she'd already named it O.

Not going to lie, I immediately thought of Oprah, and then I realized she meant Oh. As in, "Oh Deer!"

She's a quick one, that Candy.

Thursday, December 2, 2010

Because Candy was kind enough to deliver a few extra strands of lights with Oh Deer, I was able to get my other trees up and lit as well.

I've had this tree the longest out of all of my decorations, and in years past the base was held in a large white vase. It had already been broken once, which is how I got it in the first place. Mom was going to throw it out and I convinced Dad to salvage the base with super glue. After he promptly glued his fingers together and I bit the inside of my cheeks not to laugh at him, I took it home as my own.

It blew over in the wind this year when my neighbor was getting it out of the garage, and the vase broke once and for all. But I was thrilled to see the base of the tree was actually this cute wooden log. So now it's almost like I have a whole new decoration. :) I love it when accidents turn out to be happy ones!

Friday, December 3, 2010

And since I'm spending most of my time in my bedroom now, I decided I needed a bit of glowy Christmas in here, too. Yes, if you're counting, I now have three trees [not counting the nativity]... which means a tree in every room.

And I'm happy about that.

Mom is actually bringing one more big tree to put out by the fireplace, because with my little girls coming for Christmas I thought we needed a proper spot for Santa to leave his loot.

Have I mentioned that my favorite word to describe Christmas is "glowy"? Nothing better than lights.

Saturday, December 4, 2010

Which is exactly why I don't just put lights on trees.

Atop the piano is my collection of Snow Babies. Ironically, I'm not a collector at all, but I just seemed to accumulate a lot as gifts for a few years there when they were really popular. I have the perfect amount for the top of the piano and it gives me another excuse to light up the house a bit more.

Have I mentioned I love Christmas decorations?

Because I do.

Sunday, December 5, 2010

And this is just one more shot of the table centerpiece for no other reason than I really liked it.

Sometimes I'm just in it for the pictures.

Thanks for once again sharing my week with me! Click on the button below if you want to go to Jessica’s site and check out the other participants showing off their weekly photos as well: