Thursday, March 29, 2012

Head and Heart

Sara's sister, Laura here...

Do you ever have a conversation with yourself or probably more accurately, an argument with yourself.

Since I have lost Dad and Sara I have daily (feels like constant) conversations with myself and sometimes when I am really frustrated with myself, it turns into an argument between my head and my heart.

I miss them so very much. I long for their hug, their conversation, their wisdom (that is my heart speaking). Then my head argues with my heart.  “You know they are so much happier”. “How selfish of you to want them back for your own needs.” “They are still with you in spirit.”

So, the question is, how do I get my head and heart to agree? Like other things in life when conflict happens, how do you come to a compromise?

So, I come here to find the wisdom Sara left behind…what did I find… CHOOSE , JOY, PRAISE, GOD, FAITH, etc.

“He knows my past, present and future. He is surprised by nothing. He is with me, never leaves me even when I feel alone, and holds me up even when I think I am standing on my own two feet. He is good. All the time. And I am going to praise Him through it.” – Gitz

Oh…her wisdom…

“Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds in Jesus Christ.” – Philippians 4:6-7

Oh… God’s wisdom…

As I am preparing this Lenten season for the Resurrection, I am so very thankful. Thankful for all Jesus endured in order for us to experience eternal life.  Now that I have experienced the loss of ones that I have loved so deeply, that thankfulness has even become even more meaningful. Knowing that dad and Sara are together with the risen Lord helps both my head and my heart!

So, why do I keep arguing with myself? I think it's because I am jealous that God has them now...I am thankful he shared them with me as long as he selfishness wanted them longer! J

I am choosing…peace, joy, kindness, faithfulness…I am choosing to trust GOD!