Friday, January 9, 2009

We Interrupt this Flashback Friday...

With a brief commercial for a program called Storm Stories.

I've met some great people through the blogs I frequent, and so many of them try to take blogging a step beyond it's boundaries. NorEaster is doing a great feature this month called Storm Stories... where others share their stories of going through a storm, be it in their past or in their present, and how they have endured and hopefully triumphed.

He invited me to share my story so I did a short post that is going to be up on his site today. I'm posting it below, but encourage you to go to Nor's site and read the other Storm Stories for yourself. After this month is over I'm pretty sure no one who is struggling or suffering will be feeling alone. We all have storms, it's just nice when we can share an umbrella.

***** ***** *****

"If you want the rainbow, you gotta put up with the rain."

Yep, I'm quoting Dolly Parton. But that little sentence pretty much sums up my day-to-day life, because in my body there is a constant rainstorm raging. A storm of debilitating disease, pain, limitation and progression. At 35 years of age I have found myself homebound and having to give up every freedom and ability I used to treasure and enjoy. I can count on my hands the number of times I stepped foot outside of my house in the past year, and all but one of those times were for doctor appointments. There isn't one function that my body can perform without medication and my ability to do something as simple as type this post changes on a dime.

I have no career, no husband and kids, no financial security and no potential to change any of those things.

And I've never been more at peace in my entire life.

I've discovered that when everything is taken away... when nothing is left but the core of who you are... that's when you have to make a choice. I can either hide inside and let the fear of getting struck by lightening paralyze me, or I can stand out in the rain to be washed free of everything but the comfort of a God who would never let me fall. I choose every day to be washed free.

It's not easy, but it is simple. I put up with so much rain everyday, but the rainbows I am given are fantastic. I have food, shelter, clothing. I have friends who love me, not despite all of my limitations, but with them. I write everyday on my blog and people show up ... it has been a connection to the outside world that I didn't realize was missing until it fell into my lap. I have an obnoxiously cute, spoiled and ornery pup who keeps me company 24/7 and brings joy to my otherwise quiet days.

I am so blessed, people.

But the reason I am happy is because I choose to look at my blessings more than my burdens. The burdens are persistent; the pain is relentless. I walk with crutches and it takes me longer to get up out of a chair than it does for my friends to get up and walk the length of my condo and back. But I know that if God didn't have a purpose for my illness He would have taken it away from me by now. So I take it humbly and pray that if He has a purpose for me, I am paying attention so I don't miss the opportunity to serve. I'm ok with not knowing why this is happening to me because I know He knows why. It's not about me, it's about what He can do with me... my job is simply to pay attention and enjoy the rainbows.


  1. Dear Sara

    You put flesh-and-bones on this verse for me:

    Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and finisher of our faith,
    who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God.
    Hebrews 12:2

    I thank God for you.

  2. Sara God keeps using you to refocus me. I can't thank you enough for the impact you've had on my life. The more I get to know you, the more I love you.
    You matter to me~

  3. If only we all could be like this! He does so want us to depend totally on Him and if we did every color of the rainbow would stand out every day. You are awesome. I thank God for using you to reach us all.

    BTW, stop over some time. I'm tagging you. I know anyone that finds you from my blog is going to be glad they did. Blessings to you!

  4. You are a beautiful gift to this world. You are LOVED!!!

  5. I left you a comment yesterday,just asking if you take humera shots for your ankylosing spondylitis. My husband is on disabitity and called Abbott Labs and we now get his shots for free. If you want to email me my address is Just wanted to share that info with you.Take care!

  6. i need a lifetime supply of YOU in tablet form.

    i admire you greatly...

  7. You are such an inspiration. I wish your blog could be the "top story" in the news each day--it would make our whole world a better place...

  8. Dear Sara, I hope you realize that THIS is your purpose. You've reached a lot of people who need what you give them here. And, I'm not just talking about the adorable dog pics which are what attract so many of us in the first place. We come back every day for posts just like this one. You are a lovely light in an increasingly dark world for many.

  9. Sara, I believe God is using you. Your posts are always so dead-on for me, just what I need to read at the time.

    And the fact that you quoted Dolly Parton makes me love you that much more! ;)

  10. Sara - you are a gift that I give to myself! Thank you for being available.

  11. Thanks, peeps, for showing up here every day. You all help keep me focused, too, and I appreciate it!

  12. That was beautiful and inspiring.

  13. Thank you for sharing your story. You have touched my heart. You will be in my thoughts...

  14. I know I read it twice!?! But the thing is, I read and read and read again and I never grow tired of your thoughts. I find new things in there always. Thank YOU for always showing up here!

  15. I ditto what everyone said above. But you know what? YOU might be at peace with where you are in your life, but I'M not at peace with it. You're on my mind and heart every day. I read your messages, feel your inspiration, try to apply it to my own situation, and then feel guilty. Because here you are, giving to me every day with your writing, your good humor, your selfless attitude (and your very cool buttons which I *finally* figured out how to add to my blog). What can WE do for you Sarah? Besides show up to read each day ... what can WE do for you?

  16. What an inspiration you are! I love reading your blog--I can't think of a more uplifting thing to do. YOU are awesome... and I think your little dog is pretty awesome too :) Thank you for sharing so much with all of us, and THANK YOU for being you.

  17. I am in agreement with Denise....I feel like there should be something I could do to help in some way.....
    Your words always help me through the are an inspiration. Love ya' girl!

  18. Crimenetly, peeps... you do help me so much already... you showing up and commenting/chatting here is HUGE. As in, when the thought of getting myself out of bed in the morning wears me out, I get up because I want to see what you all had to say. It means a lot. There's absolutely nothing more I need from you, I swear. But if I do need something in the future, I'll definitely know who to ask :)