Thursday, November 13, 2008

The Smoothie

So here's something you should know about me: I have had more hairstyles than anyone else on the planet. I have had short hair, long hair, curly hair, straight hair, colored hair, highlighted hair, big bangs, no bangs, flipped in the back and everything in between. Whenever anything was feeling crazy in my life, my solution was to change my hairstyle.

I once had super-short hair like the new Victoria Beckham style:
and after I grew it out my (then very little) niece Anna told me she liked my hair long better than when I had it, "cut like a boy's." It's stayed long ever since.

I would show you all the photos of my different hairstyles, but that would mean bombarding you with photos of me, and I would enjoy that about as much as having my fingernails ripped out. So instead, I'm going to show you some "dog hairstyles."

I've only taken Riley to be groomed by a professional a couple of times. One reason is that I cut my own hair to save myself money, so I can't really justify spending it on my dog's hair. Another is that Riley dislikes being around other dogs more than anything else, so it seems silly to inflict a day at the vet's on him when it's not necessary.

The final reason is that the one time I had him groomed and asked for her to just "trim him up a little" he went from looking like this:


To looking like this:


Which required me to buy him this:


because it was winter and he was shaking from being so cold.

My friend Susie has a Goldendoodle named Sadie, and she is big and fluffy and funny and adorable. She's pictured below in a photo with Jonboy, which was taken before a crazy grooming appointment where she went from looking like this:


To looking like this:


After getting over the initial shock of thinking they gave her the wrong dog, the groomer told Susie that Sadie had some mats and it was easier to give her a cut they called "The Smoothie."


Just so you know, that is one hairstyle I'll never be asking for. No matter how crazy my life is or how much I think I need a change.


  1. Gitz! I am cracking up!!!!
    I have taken the 3 amigos to the groomer for a trim and they've come back naked dogs too!!!! You and Riley inspired me to start trying to cut the Boo, Bella and Bindi all by myself! I bought clippers last month and tried once. I'm tellin ya they are getting matted and I'm getting worried! Oh the poor goldendoodle just cracked me up! I love dogs.

  2. Great Pictures - Luckily my babies have short hair, so there are no surprises when they go to the groomers. I love to dress them up - but they look at me like I've committed a horrible crime, so the clothes don't stay on long.
    A goldendoodle - never heard of that mix. You learn something new every day.

  3. Oh, Gitz! Your Riley reminds me so much of my mother's maltese, Deeogee. He has been to the groomer's and been sheared also. I have tried taking some pictures of him but don't have any good ones to share. My family is a Maltese bunch. My sister started it with Darcy who will soon be 14. She bred Darcy and gave me one who I named Doogie (aka Sir Doogie Hamser) and then she kept one named Dexter. My daughter got a very tiny baby, Daisy, who only lived a few years. Then my best friend got a Maltese she named .... Riley. I couldn't believe when I found your site that you have a Maltese named Riley who looks so very much like Deeogee. I'll work on some pictures to send. I LOVE reading your blog. You are simply amazing! Gay

  4. Oh Goodness I laughed out loud at poor Riley's expense. Poor little thing. I took my SIL Yorkie to the groomers for her once, they did practically the same thing, my SIL was so mad, I have never got to take the dog agian! The dog looked more like a 3 lb. shaved rat insead of a Yorkie. It was really funny. Thanks for a laugh today.

  5. I too change my hair to feel in control! It's the only thing I have power over many times so it gets cut and changed OFTEN! :D

  6. I had to laugh. I take Beau every 5weeks and his groomer does a great job. He likes other "little" dogs but hasn't much use for the "big" dogs...and don't let anyone tell you that little dogs don't know the difference.

    His groomer is very polpular because she does exactly what you ask her to do. We tried another one one time last Spring who promised no other dogs, no cages, etc....Beau was embarrassed for several weeks and we called him "Scruffy."

    I do think they have feelings about those shaved looks...both physical and emotional. Poor babies.

  7. You SO need to warn me before you post stuff like this! Let me get the camcorder started before so you too can partake in the part where I fall off my chair in a fit of laughter! And the way you lured me in thinking I was going to read all about your "health food" routine. I should have known anyone who dines on frozen Oreos wouldn't be talking about "smoothies," unless of course, they were Oreo smoothies!

    As the owner of a golden (retriever) I've been trying to convince my husband that the next dog should be a goldendoodle mostly for the non-shedding aspect. It'd be an even tougher sell if he ever saw those pictures! Too funny!

  8. Tell Riley not to feel bad about all the laughter. Macy smiled and clapped when she saw him. She's trying to type it herself, but it's not working out. BTW, I might not even drink a smoothie for a while. I think I have a fear of having short hair.

  9. I have two golden Doodles. I took them to be groomed shortly after I got them. One is actually golden and the other is black. The black one came out looking like a puffball very little cutting but lots of brushing, and the golden one came out looking almost exactly like your pictures. Although her hair was longer to start with. I've learned to cut them both myself and I'll admit that they don't always come out looking professional but I alway recognize them.

    Sometimes I'll give them the smoothie just to make it easier, It will grow out in a month where as anything else seems to disappear in 2 weeks and these big dogs take quite a while to trim. Especially since they'd rather be chasing rabbits and swimming in the pond.

  10. Ha Ha in this picture Riley looks like he does after you give him a bath! I love that I have a link in this one!!!

  11. That happened to Snowflake. It was a few days before Curtis was born and I went to pick up Snowy from the groomer for her first cut and they had practically shaved her. I thought I had the wrong dog!

  12. Some groomers are mean spirited people...and obviously you and your friend encountered two of them. I'm so sorry for your dogs! How humiliating!

  13. Turbo, my husky/retriever, looks just like Sadie after a shave. he looks so big with his fluff, then he's skin and bones. the last person who cut his hair got a not so nice email from me as I said trim his tail, she butchered it. Not to mention she didn't cut his paw hair at all, then shaved him unevenly. It's finally grew back in. I hope Riley's grows back soon too. He doesn't need to be cold.

  14. Oh how cute.
    I have learned to groom all 3 of my dogs because of such silly things groomers can do. If they have patients they would be able to get every single mat out without doing the "smoothie".
    Your Riley is so cute.
    BTW my son's name is Riley and he's also very handsome.
    Hope your having a great weekend
    Claudie from Canada
    P.S. Sadie has a bark collar on I see (or it might be a fence thing) anyway we had a Wheaten Terrier that barked non stop and now we have 3 small dogs with bichon/poodle so more barking on that poodle side!! we love them anyway.