Friday, March 11, 2011

5 minutes: gracious love.

Today I'm linking up to Lisa-Jo aka gypsy mama, who chooses a topic every Friday and writes for five minutes.

Only five minutes.

And the rule is that whatever she writes about in that five minutes is what she posts. No editing her thoughts. Today, her topic choice is "I feel the most loved when..."

So I'm going to set the timer, write some thoughts, and then I'm going to stop.

Ready? Set. Go.

::

I feel the most loved when people do something as simple as remembering I exist.

Seriously.

I know it sounds silly, but it takes so very little for me to feel overwhelmed with love. When my friend Meg calls in the afternoon or Susie brings me a slush and remembers I like my sandwich without a tomato. It's the tiniest little things that make me realize at some point in their day, they remembered I'm here and that means that I mattered.

That's really all it takes. When one of you guys drops me a note or a card in the mail? I'm over the moon. When I get a comment on the blog? It means someone cared enough about what I said here in this little condo that they stopped what they were doing and told me their thoughts.

It totally matters.

When my mom calls because we haven't talked for a day and she wonders how I am. When my sister checks in on her way home from work. When I get a text from Alece just checking in or when Shannon texts because she's on the elliptical and wants to spend her free time talking to me.

I feel so loved.

Recently, some friends set up a system where they are making sure I get a package every week. {Jessica calls it "Operation Sara," like a CIA mission :)} Something in the mail from someone different… I never know who it's going to be, it's just something so I know they're out there and they know I'm in here.

It's a humbling love.

I am so ridiculously overwhelmed by it. And feel completely unworthy of all of it because I so often feel like I can't give enough back. I try to give 100% of myself to people, but I know my 100% isn't what it used to be… and the fact that no one is keeping track and just loving me anyway?

That's real love. Gracious love.

It's not big and grand and over the top.

It's the daily reminders that we're in it together.

::

Ok, this is a little addendum to the five minutes I rambled earlier: I am so hoping I didn't sound like I mean for you all to feel like you need to send me things... I love the notes I get but would never expect anything and promise I don't need a single thing. You all have such kind hearts... I just love you all and am incredibly grateful I get to share life with you. :)

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